On might and motherhood

Being a mother is a complex ball of constant emotion. Motherhood is two sides to the same coin, it’s realizing what complex individuals our mothers were at our age. Learning that even though they were our whole-wide-world they were still coming into their own. Learning this lesson through living it, through looking down into the wide eyes of your greatest creations and wondering who is this magical being they revere. It’s coming into your magic in the warm glow of the magic of another.

 It’s so easy to stop showing up in love, it’s hard work to love someone through their pain grief and sadness show up in so many ways for so many of us. As a mother, I expected to learn to love through the tantrums. Through the episodes, through the toy cars to the forehead. As mothers, that’s our job.

What was unexpected on this journey into being a mother was that I’d need to love myself through those things. That on the days when it gets hard to battle all the demons at my doorstep teaming up with the monsters in my mind, I’d still have to show up in love for my daughter. No one tells you of the Might, that lies in motherhood.

The day before my second Mother’s Day I had an exchange with people who live in my heart. An exchange that rocked my core and the only way I could continue to stand in love was to be cognizant of the fact that these women were going through this thing as well, they were teetering on a tightrope between the love for their mothers and the love as the mothers they wish to be.

Being a Mother

The beauty of womanhood I find is in that teetering, living in constant flux internally yet still managing to balance it all. Outwardly appearing as if we have it together, have it well planned and thought out. The strength comes in the elegance, perfected in the dark.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the women who found a way to show up in love in-spite of, because of, and through the pain. You are the real MVP’s.

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